Mothers : Scourge of the Working World?

Did this title anger you? 

It should, but even if it did what are you going to do about it?

Nothing probably.

I work in a sector that is 90%+ women and I haven’t done much. 2015 is the year I’m going to change that.

What's frustrating and fascinating is that even with women in positions of authority in the social sector, mothers are treated as a badly as they are in the rest of the working world.

Like criminals who steal time and resources from the company. I personally know dozens of women fired on maternity leave. Even more who have quit jobs or not returned to work because employers treat mothers like recently patrolled inmates - child care treated like a substance abuse problem shamefully to be dealt with privately and not to interfere with work. Reflecting on just two recent reads where people consider it fine to criticize a working mom and about an employer telling a person to “give up her child”. What?!

In the past I have reached out and helped peers in these times of challenge but more needs to be done and I struggled with how. Networking is my thing, like the little drummer boy it’s the one gift I can give to my network and I’ve learned that when it comes to bigger ideas, only fools try to tackle them alone.

So I'm building a private network for mothers made up of anyone in my network who wants to join, all are welcome. And I'm certainly not the 'male authority' running the show but more the servant of this network here to keep things moving and make connections happen.

Let me make it clear why am I doing this:

1. This is personal. I’m trying to save my own soul and shut up my own complains of “who’s going to do something about this?!”. Not those dolts in HR, not the ‘leaders’ who yap on about it. I’m shutting up and putting some personal skin in the game.
2. I have a mother, a sister, even my own wife has been ill treated in this way. In my wife's case it brings me to madness that because I "love her" that I'm incapable of objectively recommending her professionally. While it's true, I do “love her”, the decision to create an unbreakable life-long union was because of my respect and admiration for her work ethic, personal values and career ambition. Marriage was the ultimate professional endorsement! But I digress.
3. In recognition that women built my personal career. I have had WAY more female mentors, sponsors, teachers than men in my career. Especially when I started a family, professional women in my life helped me immensely. It’s payback time ladies.

A big thanks to the team at CBC Metromorning Toronto for their #2forTO initiative that helped me decide 2015 was the year to do this and I was allowed to ‘start small but just start’. And to Leah Eichler and the Globe and Mail Careers crew whose work has been so helpful to the younger women I serve, coach and support.

So, dear network I'm asking anyone interested to join my private group. And if you're not in my neck of the woods feel free to create your own.

The goals are:

• Connecting mothers returning to the working world with peers to help them with job searches and preparing for them
• To keep in touch with mothers in the year of maternity leave for the purpose of keeping in touch with their industry
• To support mothers in those critical first five years of their child’s life when they are working and balancing child care

We’re going to host some events, do LinkedIn workshops and I’ll be fostering a lot of private meetings. Who knows how much good we’ll do but by God, we’ll do some good.

After all, we value our peers. Heck were losing the brains, ideas and networks of half the population here. Are you with me? (Said in a very Jerry McGuire type voice).

Send me an email, LinkedIn message, tweet that says. “Paul, I’m in”.

Join the #MomNetwork

Paul

*I am not a feminist, I don’t know if this is politically correct or not. I hope it doesn’t come off as paternalistic, patronizing or condescending in any way. I’m a humanist in service of great people I know. I didn’t know what else to do so I said “shut up Paul and do something’'. Hope that makes sense.

My 2015 Networking MVP Awards

Five years ago, networking had such a profound impact on my life I had to express my gratitude over and above a simple ‘thank you’.

The “Golden Crab award” was born in 2011. Since then, I have taken a few days at the start of each year to reflect on who has had the most impact on my life, work, career and thank them publicly. If you feel inclined, here are 2011, 2012, 2013 and 2014’s winners.

This year held massive change and challenge for me, almost every single person who has been named on this list helped in some way to push and pull me past my fears and helped me to make the change I knew needed to happen. Not just a job change, but a change in the very way I think and live.

To every person reading this post who is part of my network, if you have not read this post on all you do for me please do. These are the four people who I have to call out for making 2014 my greatest year on earth.

Calling out this first person is kind of awkward, because up until recently, I worked for him. But I’ve known him for almost 15 years, he’s been a teacher and mentor for much of that time and now that I don’t work for him I can go back to being on the executive of his fan club. It’s no surprise to anyone that Malcolm Burrows is first on this list. One of the most emotionally intelligent human beings I know on earth, he taught me the value of imperfection, flexibility and focus. He challenged me and gave me the chance to ride along on the adventure that is his work and impact on Canada’s philanthropic sector. What I admire most is for someone who has accomplished much he retains a sense of curiosity, play and humility that is an inspiration in my work and life.

It sounds so easy to call out the head of my beloved Canadian Association of Gift Planners, Ruth MacKenzie. But she’s on this list first for what she has taught me about being a courageous human being and a leader, secondly for her profound impact on the community that is the fuel for my career and increasingly, weaved into my DNA. I value humility, kindness, wisdom but I also require unequivocal excellence in the people I elect to be on my personal board of directors. What Ruth has done, in service to the volunteers, with strategy and action -  caused me to rethink what I’m doing with my life. And in the middle of a personal crisis this year, we had a talk that reminded me what real heroes are made of. This is a networking award, a leadership award an expression of admiration and gratitude. Ruth, you are a rockstar. I’m grateful to be part of your team and for your partnership, mentorship and unabashed awesomeness. I almost forgot people like you exist until this year.

In 2012 I set a goal that took me two years to achieve. As the leadership guru Napoleon Hill once said – a dream is useless until it’s spoken out loud and then it becomes a goal. I told my dream to Charles O’Neil, that I was becoming an isolated expert and needed to figure out how to get to the east coast of Canada to listen and learn from peers there. Of all the people I asked for help with this goal, Charles was the person to work to make this dream possible. This past fall I got to spend time doing exactly what I needed. Listening, being in dialogue, expanding my network and learning about the culture and climate of philanthropy in a community I really didn’t understand. I have been given the honour of teaching in several roles and I want to ensure my perspective is national and grounded in the real work done by peers in the philanthropic sector. Charles made that possible with such generosity, he reminded me why he recently won the highest award in my profession.

When I talk about having a personal board, I often talk about the need for a spot for someone younger than you who often will ‘scare you forward’ by their sheer awesomeness. Some people are annoyed by a younger person out pacing them and challenging their personal best – I’m inspired by it. Rory Green was that person for me in 2014. I was in Canada’s national newspaper the Globe & Mail earlier this year confessing that I’m a ‘wanna be Millennial’ because of their skill, drive, values and how they manifest them very early in a career. It was Rory’s story I was telling. Overcoming challenges, and like me at a younger career moment, the haters. Rory collaborated on numerous networking events and ideas, gave so generously and connected like a networking boss. She pushed herself in speaking roles, social media strategy and career. Many young professionals in social-profit consider Rory a rockstar. She is and I’m so proud and grateful to know her.

Earlier this year I called all the previous Golden Crabs together for a dinner. And each of them continue to play a pivotal role in my work and life, they are my MVP’s of networking after all. Alan, Ann, Kate, Promod, Clare, Christina, Leah, John, Brock, Lisa, Emma, Nizam, David and Shannon – thank you for all you have done and continue to do for me and our shared network.

Shout outs this year go to:

• Maeve Strathy and all the young professionals who have given me the chance to be their personal board and part of the most exciting moments in their careers
• Heather Jewell and Jason Shim for creating “Pints Not Profits” a networking group for technical professionals in the social-profit community
• Elizabeth Rejman and Janice Cunning for constantly collaborating and allowing me to be part of their professional evolution and being such a strong part of mine.
• Jaime, Heidi, Peter and the Tangerine network. For leading by example, teaching by doing and reminding the world that social business is real and there’s huge value in it
• Lina Duque for her kind feature on me in the Globe & Mail and her course at Ryerson University as well as teachers like Don Tapscott and the ever-awesome Terry O’Reilly and CBC Radio for producing the greatest brain food in Canada
• Anthony and Vivian at Mancave Barbershop for helping me change how I thought of me before I could change how the world did. And Tom Mihalik Jr. for being my style guide and generously speaking again to help guys suit up and restart their own self image. 
• The teams at Gift Planning in Canada, Hilborn Fundrasing eNews, AFP eWire, the Globe and Mail Giving Guide, Charity Executive TV and CharityVillage for allowing me to write and be part of their education and service to the sector
• The hundreds of people who have come with me on the road and netwalked in 2014!

I can’t say it enough dear network – I kind of don’t exist without you.

You are how I succeed and achieve my life mission to help others do the same. Thank you for all you do, who you are and letting me be part of it!

My best wishes to you for great success in 2015 and as always please remember that I’m at your service – let me know how I can help you get to where you want to be in 2016.

With great gratitude, Paul

 

Thank you dear network

I’m not one for resolutions.

Each year around the new year I make some time to reflect, a personal strategy retreat. Usually alone and I check in on how I’m feeling about work, life, love and if I am where I want to be. What profoundly overwhelmed me this year more than most was what you, dear network, did for me.

You reached out, you pitched in, you pushed your way in sometimes when I was feeling negative and needed help. My goodness you are a powerful bunch of world-changers and I am deeply grateful, for each and every one of you.

This is the time of year I sit down, read through all my contacts (it takes a couple of hours), reflect on how they’ve helped me and name my personal networking MVP’s but in a digital age it’s hard to personally write to 3000 LinkedIn connections and 5500 Twitter followers but I want to say, just once as we start this year …

They say ‘it takes a village to raise a child’ well it certainly takes a network to build a life, achieve personal success and to have the impact one wants to have on the world.

I kind of don’t exist without you.

Thank you for everyone who collaborated on projects and events, who kept me informed about ideas and activity I should be involved in. Who advocated for me around speaking engagements and writing opportunities and especially those who pushed me to evolve to what has been the most powerful job change of my life ( did you know that I changed jobs? ).

As usual, let me remind you. That I am here for you, that I am in your corner and am your advocate and servant in all things dear network.

Thank you to those who let me in, let me help. That too is a gift.

So if you have an idea you need to say out loud, or physically mastermind with people in a room, if you have a networking idea or presentation to give, some personal board members to turn over or yes a body to move ( I have access to Zipcar vans eh )….

I’M AT YOUR SERVICE

People call me stuff like “networking king” or “social media guru” these things make me ill, not in a humblebrag way - I’m outright not these things. I’m a connector to the real experts, a collaborator and amplifier of your awesomeness and as much as it looks like I’m leading on some things, my utmost desire is to serve in all things.

So how can I help you in 2015?

Be in touch, seriously, reach out. By email, via LinkedIn or yes, Twitter.

Do it today.

After all, I have almost everything I desire in this world and YOU are the reason I have it. I’d love to do the same for you.

Have a great 2015, see you soon dear network.

Paul

Grab your pitchforks. It’s time for a good old mob!

It’s funny how negativity accumulates

It creeps in, piles up, grows like a weed inside you, around you silently until you realize it’s become part of how you think – that’s not a good thing and you know it.

I’m not one for resolutions but recently my favourite personal board member, the CBC metromorning crew in Toronto put forth a challenge to the city. Two for Toronto

Can you do two small things, to add some positivity to the world around you? Tiny things like starting a bird box library in your neighbourhood or partnering with a local organization like the parks movement. Listen to Matt and the team talk with some idea folks here.

I love being part of something positive, simple, fun – so I’m in!

My second idea is a more quiet and private/personal one. It’s about the value of Mothers, read more here. But first I’ve decided it’s time to go on the attack.

Grab your pitchforks, torches, wallet and business cards we’re going to attack and loot a local Toronto business!

How is this helping Toronto and how is this positive you ask? Well that negativity I was talking about creeped into my emotional vocabulary last year just near the end. And a good old fashioned positive explosion is just what the doctor ordered to wash it out.

How does this relate to “attacking” a business? Oh we’re going to mob it all right – a “Carrot Mob” is what it’s called. Something the ever-awesome Terry O’Reilly, Canada’s adman in Chief, another CBC host shared at the recent Walrus Talks on Philanthropy. Its not a boycott, it’s a BUYcott!

Now the idea (see here) was pretty hippie and involves all sorts of complicated agreements with the company that the profits will be used for sustainable investment or food security blah blah, I’m keeping it simple.

Tuesday February 10th at 6pm, we’ll gather after work, do a bit of “netwalking” in the Annex and go to the brand new Bulk Barn to get healthy or unhealthy snacks, but to welcome this great store to the area. Then we’ll go nearby for some food and more networking. For details and to RSVP click here.

I love this, hope you do too dear network. See you there!

And Matt, Jill and the whole Metromorning crew, thanks to you for the idea and fostering some friggin positivity in this city. We can all use a little more.

If you don’t follow CBC Metromorning or other CBC idea-people on Twitter I’ve made these lists so click on their names above and follow to keep learning from them and participating in great ideas like this!

And if you’re looking for a great read to combat negativity in 2015 read Amy Morin’s wonderful : 13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do.

Best of the new year to you, and a challenge – what two tiny things can you do to make your world a better place?

Please share in the comments or on Twitter using #2forTO

As always, thanks for reading,

Paul Nazareth

Welcome new Twitter Followers!

Thank you for investing your time on Twitter with me!

I wanted to say a personal thanks and to be up front about what you’ll find in your feed from me and what I hope to do for you as a follower.

For the past decade my interest in social media has not been social, I am obsessed with the future of digital business. You’ll see lots of content on how and why business and social are working together.

My career for the past 15 years has been in fundraising – I now work for a national Canadian charity that serves hundreds of advisors (law, finance & accounting), thousands of charities and millions of donors called CanadaHelps. So you’ll find trends in finance, philanthropy and fundraising strategy with insights crossing the country on a regular basis allows me to observe.

I live to serve passionate professionals, it’s my personal mission in life. Networking is the very air that I breath. So you’ll see lots of content on connecting for better business and a better life.

Lastly, I’m an addicted reader. Business books mostly, biographies and other material that keeps me learning and giving me the tools to help others find their way to personal success. I have a business book blog that I post from here.

WARNING!! I feel I should inform you of the following!

• 90% of my tweets are scheduled, sure I interact but I work a lot so I almost never live tweet except from events or talks. Consider me your resource on digital business, smart philanthropy and personal success – ask me a question though, I’ll always be there.
• This is 98% a professional account, there will be no pictures of my kids, instagrammed lunch or music concerts. The 2% is my own personal insights on movies, mens’s style and political stuff.
• I’m interested in your personal success, so from time to time I’m going to get all up in your business and ask how I can help. This is why I’m here, it’s what I live for, to lift up great people.

Thanks again for the follow, remember I am here to help. So ask questions, ask for introductions, challenge me on my position on anything.

This is the world’s largest networking event and I just asked you “so who are you and why are you on this earth?” – I look forward to your response.

Paul Nazareth

Enjoy this quick video on Twitter for business!

Twitter for Business